" "My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them." "

— Mitch Hedberg

" The longer the wait, the sweeter the kiss. "

— me

" Your sister is a jewel, a priceless, one-of-a-kind gem who makes living precious for many people, including you. "

— Dave Pipitone

" The moon was a ghostly galleon tossed upon cloudy seas. "

— Alfred Noyes

" "I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member." "

— Groucho Marx

" Show a little faith in someone when they need it. It’s amazing how it comes back around to you. "

— Garon Whited, Knightfall